LET NOT MY VOICE DIE WITH ME, I AM HUNCHO AND THIS IS HOW I DIED!!!

Many years Ago I was Harry, I grew up, I’m 23 years old, my name is Huncho not my real name though, I’m Velvine Nungari, a beautiful smart girl,hard working with all my life ahead of me, pushing to make it on my own even though my family is super well of, I don’t want to stress them everyday by asking for money for things like makeup or personal utilities, I believe I can do it on my own, independence is my goal.

I look for a job, I do one two promotional jobs out there and boom!! I land on a waitress job and bingo! This can push me through for sometime it has awesome tips and I decided to hold on to it. While I’m working, I meet so many people, make so many friends, sometimes hang out with them after my shift and later just go home to rest looking forward to tomorrow, then I meet this particular guy with his friends, they come every day and if I’m not serving them, then they’re I’m just saying hi or wanting to hang out and catch up, at first, I’m skeptical about it, I tell myself no, but again he comes again and again until I agree to give him my number and we talk, agree to go out for date, in my head I finally lowered my guard and believed that he is a good guy that he was pretending to be.looks ca surely be deceiving.

True Image of Antony Njenga Murimi, the Perpetrator!

The date is set and the venue is no problem and infact if it gets late he can always check into a hotel room for us. We finally met up, had a time of our lives and before we know it, it’s late and I’m drugged I can’t remember what happened afterwards but as a precautionary measure I text my best friend and tell her that I’m in B hotel and if they do not see me, they should call Mr. Strangers number below, sounds like a joke, right? Everyone does that with their best friend at some point!

After a few days I wake up from my subconscious state, can’t remember a thing, can’t move, I’m in a hospital bed with videos going round social media about how things happen, I look like I’m consenting from my behavior but I can’t really recall if I did or didn’t, did I get to my room and said No sex? no one knows. Were there his friends in the room? Can’t remember but again. After my friends follow up they find me in the hotel room with an open door, helpless and dying. There I am with a broken spinal cord, a ruptured cervix, pelvic fractures and evidence that I was tho beaten, I’m put in isolation and It was so bad that I ended succumbing to my injuries.

Yes I’m dead, I can’t speak out, I can’t tell you what exactly happened to me from the time we went to the hotel room and anything there after, but the evidence from my lifeless body speaks it all, either I said No and it got me beaten and raped forcefully or I said yes to him but in the room there were many more men who forcefully raped me in rounds and beat me up to the state I was in or maybe, just maybe he was alone and being psychopath that he was, just wanted to destroy me after the act, you and I may never know exactly what happened but still you and I should never believe what Mr. Stranger says because one thing is clear, He is the perpetrator and I think the least you can do is never let anyone else go through what I did, it killed meaning literally, so I can assure you it was painful beyond my withstanding!

True image of Velvine Nungari Kinyanjui, alive and in her cascate.

Remember Harry? Atleast she came out alive and she could tell her story, for me I can’t. Remember when her mother was so overprotective of her from the society, friends and everything around her, these are the reasons, see when I died, women were out here judging and asking, was I dressed properly, what was I doing with a stranger, I was working in a bar so I was used to these things, why was I following materialistic assets? The men said that my behavior showed that I wanted the sex!!!!

Now Let me educate you on one two things, as a man, unless a woman says yes I want sex, how her body reacts is NOT consent, she can always CHANGE HER MIND and that is called withdrawal of consent. Anything after that is RAPE!
For the women, the least you can do is validate your fellow woman story, weather alive or dead, they can never say I was raped if there was no form of abuse, there always was, weather in a fling, a relationship, marriage or if it was a strange, because you are the next victim!

The rules of dealing with a survivor are summarize into 5 letters (L. I. V. E. S)

L-LISTEN

I-INQUIRE

V-VALIDATE

E- ENSURE SAFETY

S-SUPPORT

IF YOU ARE NOT DOING ALL THESE JUST DON’T GET INVOLVED BUT REMEMBER YOUR SILENCE IS THE PERPETRATOR’S EMPOWERMENT AND YOUR VOICE IS THE CHANGE THAT SAVES A LIFE.

Harry survived but Huncho, she doesn’t have a voice of her own! Let her story SAVE ANOTHER WOMAN’S LIFE!

CHOICE, CHANCE OR LUCK

The problem with our generation is that we want everything to look “figured out” at 25 without much struggle, not even a ounce of effort…..

Lemme give you some truth here
The “I want to be a doctor” dream will always be a dream unless you fight hard and strong.

At 18 or16 if you are special, you’ll finished your high school education and join campus, this is where real life decisions are made or unmade, build or broken.
You might join campus wanting to be a doctor and come out as Dr. Drug dealer or statistician and come out as a body count Master.
Campus is not a glass of wine as most people think and no it’s not a hell hall as everyone portray it, it’s a neutral bucket of nostalgia that you need to act on swiftly and smartly.

Art by Maneltahri

On the gold standard, you can handle it really well and with so much ease, on the worst case scenario, you can be handled like a rug.

In these kinds of environment where there’s a thin line between a shrewd decisions and a bad call, the good child would give an ear to their parent’s counsel;to study smart and hard and just do what brought them to campus but most of our peers usually succumb to the pressure, not just societal, peer, peer pressure. Clearly the poison that is ailing our generation.
It’s fun at the beginning, so much fun that they end up forgetting their aspirations, in fact apart of their brains starts to imagine that it’s all about the drugs beyond the books.
The Sodom and Gomorrah that sets in is unfathomable my dear friends. You’d just pray that your child comes our alive. They are more scared of pregnancy than HIV or STI, they worry more about what clothes they’ll put on more than knowledge they’ll gain in that particular day, just imagine a child who is more scared about what people say opposed to what pain my parents would feel. Missing a date was more painful than missing a class. It kept me wondering if it was exposure or just greed…. But again I wondered why my poverty directed my greed to knowledge more as compared to money maybe I’d be rich but again, I’d rather keep my dignified self on poverty, if it makes sense…

Everything was available at anyone’s disposal, You wanted a brothel? Just target a single party, needed drugs? Follow the party organizers or peddlers to the dark corners or their rooms. Wanted the best cocktails in town? There were special mixologist on the parties, they could turn konyagi to glefidich or even cognac in just a simple shake, they even know varieties of canabis, needless to say they offer sex for free and this is where the fun boat sinks.
It’s my business and none of in the same measure, morally I’m obligated tell you because you need to take care of someone but again I’m not because adults do make decisions with or without your opinion!

Painting Originally by Beverly Ash Gilbert

All these said and done, they awake from slumber a week to their exams, 3days to maybe….. to just do it, for the papers? Maybe or is it for their parents!… It’s usually too late and it’s too painful, a piece of paper and a black robe with a cap, a good bad child celebrated for the day, the parents will never mind whether it’s a an honors or a pass or just a hired gown for the moment totally forgetting that a piece of paper will never fix a broken mind. Then there are those who never really wake up, they go down the drains just like that, the university goes through them like they never existed, their friends never even try to help them, they are good as broken glass or spilt milk, pure waste of resources. It’s never late to find help though.

That is why we have so many young people, graduates, with high end papers or even just a pieces of paper but unable to convince the world that he has what it takes or just a piece of paper the world cannot trust with responsibility because the society pushed so hard for dreams that the owner never believed in so there was never a point to actualize!

And of course there’s the top cream, the wise good good children, who the university molds as it was supposed to, they come out as fine creatures, with careers awaiting and the push through every hadle and they make it in life. They are the 40%of the whole ad and 95%of the shrewd choice takers.

First it’s usually about chance and then choices and then there’s smart work, it’s all about you!!!

It’s Never about luck!
So, for your 25 to be figured out you need smart moves, whether there is a chance or a choice on your table, how smart you act determines your luck.

Hello March!!…

Suba

Raw unedited Images of Hombay County, Mbita, an amazing destination for hodophiles. Assurance of reconnection with nature, peaceful environment and amazing culture as well as breathtaking sunset views, there’s more to explore!

Sunset view from lambwe Valley, Hombay County, Kenya
View of lake Victoria from Rusinga Island Lodge, Hombay County, Kenya.
Alternate sunset view from lambwe Valley
Hombay – Mbita highway

Pain, More to it….

Of course her mother had all the reasons to be overly protective. Perhaps if I knew what to be a mother felt like, I’d elaborate better, it’s not that I haven’t been but well, it’s not just her way!
An abusive first marriage, rejection from your own mother and a father that doesn’t give up on you, a 2nd husband who loves you but doesn’t love your child from the other marriage and now your own little daughter fell a victim of an overly friendly pedophile neighbor, a young man who’s new around the estate but again, not so new because everyone knew him around, just not you!…. I mean with all this, luck of trust is the least she could express!!

I couldn’t tell weather it was stress or just deep thoughts but she always stared in the air, lost in her own thoughts, I would forgive her if it was murder or castration but thank goodness I couldn’t reach her thoughts, nonetheless I know her capabilities and I can tell for free that this is what we had in common, the ability to fight for our loved ones in the dirtiest ways possible.

Lemme take you back, Little Harry, her little, smart and lovely daughter, had been defiled not once; too many a times she couldn’t remember but this time it was diffferent, he was having an actual penetration, little Harry could not stand that and she said No to it, this time round she was lucky that the door was opened, unfortunately, the gate was locked so she decided to climb up the gate to save her little self from what she felt was wrong only to find herself on a hospital bed, delibitated, with a wailing mother at her bedside and a group of police officers awaiting her not so certain resurrection.

She had landed on her mother’s arms as mama strolled from work, funny how God saves the innocent, she had actually “flown” from the inside of the gates. literally landed from the air!!

The questions were overwhelming, the pain over and above but at her death bed, she tried to answer most if not all… And her mother’s fear actually came true,first he used fingers on every child who crossed his path , even the little boys, showed them what a penile protrusion looked like, also just a tip every other time and this time he wanted it all and his favorable victim was the introverted, nerdy Harry…it wasn’t him alone, the other neighbor’s son also thought little Harry was growing into a big girl and could pinch her tits, also her sisters friend kept on saying he will wait for a year or too to “buy her chocolates”, oooh and her cousin also keeps asking her to go to his crib at night whenever she’s in the village and not forgetting her uncle’s farm keeper who kept on grabbing her in the dark corners and pressing her against the wall……….. No one wanted to hear the rest except mama, it was heart breaking.


She remembered the many times she tried to complain to mama about not wanting to go to the village or someone was harassing her or she didn’t Iike her friends but mama was always busy, occupied by her pains in life and her work or just thinking and her father, her father didn’t much interact with her he was a busy man or a drunk man or both but listening was not in her schedule maybe just if it was academic progress!!

Arrests were made case was decided and through all these Harry was still incapacitated, no chance to know what happened to her assailant /pedophile.

She lived through it, now an adult who looks at sex as weapon of destruction, judges men as pedophiles and trust… Trust to her is just another word without meaning.
forbidden to talk about her story, her mother died with all the bitter experiences and with her name on her mouth, worried more about her than the life that was escaping from her… Today little Harry still lives in her as much as she can’t remember his face, she still can’t forget the pain, she never healed, we never heal from this!!

Photo from the internet.

I said I’d forgive her if it was murder or castration, No dear, I’d be an accomplice….. Because Harry is Me, Harry is you, She is your daughter or your niece and like any other mother our daughters come first…..

What is your story? Are you Harry? Harry’s mother? Or the pedophile?…..

What is your forbidden story…..

………………………………………………………… Miss. Soinan

Ups and Downs

What if there were no ups nor downs???could there be achievements? or would life be perfect ?

A life that we need not to live yet we still push through,what’s the purpose of it all when we have nothing driving us , no motivation,

no struggles??

What’s life???that’s where we need to begin for us to find purpose, for us to understand what we are  living for…

“US” doesn’t exist it just you+ you+you =”us”